Friday, July 6, 2012

change

change is a good thing.  it helps us learn, grow, move forward and move on.  change can be a healer, a motivator and even a necessary evil - depending on the situation at hand.  change is always upon us, asking us to embrace it and go with it for a ride, never quite telling us where we'll end up, but always requesting our trust up front, paid in full.

change is difficult to make, even when we know it must be done.  happiness may be within sight, but we may be paralyzed by indecision, by doubt and most notably by the abundant fear that always impairs clear vision. 

the unknown has a way of crippling us, keeping us from acting and holding us back from a chance to find a solution, find happiness, find peace.  eventually we regain our footing, and when we do, we're often left wondering why we didn't act sooner, embracing change and moving on.

i have in the past known of changes i needed to make and waited longer than i should have to act.
these are lessons that no one can teach you, they have to be lived through, so you learn to respect time's sensitive nature, the briefness of life and the clarity that comes from not making the same mistakes twice.

ever since 2007, the first week in july has signaled major change in my life.  it may just be a coincidence, but it has been a constant, for each year, during this week, the winds of change breeze through.

today i am leaving a job that i have had for the past five and half years.  a job that during the first week of july, in the year 2007, allowed me to make a major change in my life.  a change for me, but more importantly, a change for my daughter.  one that 
finally afforded us the opportunity to start a life on our own.  a change that gave me the gift of being able to close the most difficult chapter of my life, albeit one that i dogeared and highlighted for future reference and life lessons to reflect upon. 

during the years that i have held this job, many things have changed around me, but it has remained stable while always keeping me on my toes.


this job has taken me all over the country, to 16 states and countless cities and introduced me to places and people who have had a tremendous impact on my life.  it has allowed me to hear stories and be a part of a movement, to help people who needed a voice, a champion and a prayer.

it is a job that i always felt good about, proud of and even in the worst of times, reminders of the best of times, always got me through.

today, with this change, i leave on the best of terms - my own - motivated by new opportunities and a fresh start.  but a piece of my heart gets left behind, intentionally.  what's up ahead remains to be seen.  there is no complete revelation of it yet, only hints of what may possibly come to be.  the fear of the unknown is ever present, but i have learned to not let it cripple me, instead it serves as a cautionary embrace.

i believe where we are is where we are meant to be and where we're going is always within our control.

i always shed a tear for change, regardless of its nature, because proper respect for the past is always due.  but today i also breathe a tremendous sigh of relief, for i have put my trust in change and built my faith around the past.   in the past five years, during this week of july, change has never let me down and i have no reason to believe that today, it will be any different.

-k

3 comments:

  1. Sniff, sniff. Very poignant. Wishing you fabulous things to come!

    ReplyDelete

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