creative outlet

in the past couple of months a series of events have occurred that have really caused me to step back and take an inventory of things.  it started around christmas when some friends referred a friend of theirs to me for some help with an upcoming book.

what’s interesting about my new friend is that he has completely shifted everything in his life to pursue an entirely new venture and to write a book about it in the process.  without  going into too many details, the basic premise for the book centers on the idea that everyone has a true passion in life and work that they aspire to do.  i found our particular meeting and the conversation that followed to be both serendipitous and in some ways, life-altering.

to say that our conversation was timely is an understatement.   the idea about finding work that is enjoyable and creative has been swirling in my head for a number of years.  in recent months that swirling in my head has become ever-so-deafening to my ears.  i was beginning to feel as though i was drowning in my own self-doubt and uncertainty about what it is that I am supposed to be doing to earn a living.  i’ve obviously never drowned before, but i had a close call with it once and I can honestly say the feeling of having creative ideas and not being creative, feels a lot like being trapped under water.

i know i am not alone in this.  at some point whether you’re sitting in a cube or sitting in 5 o’clock traffic, daydreams of finding what you love to do are always just a gaze in the distance away.  there are a million reasons to talk yourself out of it but with any luck, there are a million and one reasons to push you toward it.  the struggle is finding balance and of course finding what it is that you want to do and making it happen.  well, and having faith that you'll get paid in the process somehow too. 

lately i have been seeking out more opportunities where i can fine tune my creativity and hone in on the type of projects that allow me to take ownership in my work and feel proud of the time i devote to it.

in the last month and as recently as yesterday, i have found myself among two very different but very unique groups of creative people.  and within these groups i have the opportunity to work on two projects that excite me and make me feel good about the work I am contributing.   i feel like i’ve been holding my breath for opportunities like this to arrive and for the first time, in a long time, i can breathe again.

let me be clear, i'm not quitting my full time job.  (boss, if you're reading this...) but i am increasing the amount of freelance projects i take on and surrounding myself with opportunities to try new things.  i can't be certain any of it will go anywhere but I know if i don't at least dip my toe in, i'll never know for sure.    

so we'll see how it goes.  with any luck, a few new projects here and there will be just what I need to keep my head above water and my creativity afloat.